We all go through tough times in life - Mahesh Bang

Q: I am considering filing for a divorce as the past two years have been constantly fighting. Is it the right decision and when should I file for divorce? | DS A: In most instances where decisions are made in anger or out of frustration, it usually leads to longterm regrets. You must know that in the last 18 months, people around the world have had a tough time and their frustrations have increased because of the current pandemic. Generally, around age 45, most females experience hormonal changes. During this time, some women become very sensitive, can be easily irritated and experience mood swings. This is also the time when a wife is in greater need of emotional support from her husband. Remember your wife is going through this phase, which is temporary. My suggestion is for you to show more affection, love and care, rather than considering a divorce. Also, she is experiencing a tough time. Her temperament will definitely improve. Before contemplating divorce, consider the following: 1. Marriage is like a plant, you have to nurture it. If you put in enough effort, it will blossom, otherwise it will die. Both partners must work at it. 2. Weigh the good and the bad your spouse has brought into your life. In nearly every instance, the good will always outweigh the bad. 3. Always respect your wife, as women have a special place in Vedic culture. According to Hinduism, when taking the name of God, one takes the female aspect (energy) of God’s name first: Sita Ram; Radhye Shyam; Gauri Shanker and Lakshmi-Narayana. 4. A husband must be understanding. A woman’s work these days does not end at the office. She has to carry on working at home, even if she had a tiring day. Indian men in general shy away from kitchen duties. So, if she is a bit sensitive on such days, overlook it and be understanding. 5. Nowadays, given the fast-paced lives we lead, your spouse is likely to take strain from the pressure of strenuous daily chores. It will be more beneficial for your relationship, in the long term, to consider hiring a domestic worker. If it is not affordable, make some adjustments to your living expenses to afford a domestic worker’s fees. 6. Marital problems usually stem from differences in opinion between mothers-in-law and wives, which is widely misinterpreted as interference, when it should be seen as guidance from elders. Only if it persists, does it become an interference. Mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law should not battle for the love of a son/husband. The different types of love each gives cannot be compared. 7. Miscommunication can also lead to many problems.The key to a successful marriage is “talk”. Ensure that you do not go to bed without resolving arguments related to issues of the day. Don’t allow a small wound to become infected. It’s best treated timeously. 8. Most important: Try to understand that marriage is for both good and bad days. This is life and everyone experiences some tough times, be it health issues/work pressure etc. A change in the planetary alignment in your horoscope etc, is another factor. An intelligent man understands this and endures this period with a positive attitude and strong mind, knowing that it will pass. 9. Ask your wife to fast on Sawan (Mondays) (currently we are in Sawan month), Teej and on “Karwa Chauth” which is best and the most beneficial fast for a wife to remain happy and enjoy a blissful married life. Q: Please can you assist me in obtaining my Ishtadev and if possible provide me with a mantra for my Ishtadev. | KK A: Astrologically, 5th house denotes about one Ishtadev (favourite deity) and sometimes 9th house. In your 5th house, the sign Capricorn is rising, the lord of Capricorn is Saturn. Your Ishtadev is Hanuman Ji/Shanidev. Your favourite mantra is Om Shree Hanumate Namah. For 24 months chant daily. Whenever Aries, Scorpio, Capricorn and Aquarius sign rise in the 5th house in one’s chart, then their Ishtadev is Hanuman Ji. Q: I would like to know if you can do a reading for me and if you can put things right in my life. What do you charge? How can I see you? | AK A: If you provide your birth details then we could do your reading. An astrologer can show you a correct path or you can say astrological remedial measures to brighten your path. Beside astrological remedy, hard work, positive attitude and good intention towards others greatly help build your good destiny. Actually astrology gives shape to the effect of your hard work.

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